I knew that today was the anniversary of my Mom's passing. I was reminded of it recently as I heard the news that a former manager had passed away after a battle with cancer. In a small way she was always a bit of a mother figure, giving me my first break of a real solid job after college.
I had thought about today's anniversary but it had kind of been pushed back in my mind behind thoughts of my sleep quest with Cameron, concerns about my work closing and all the many thoughts that dash through my head on a daily basis.
Of all things I was in the car on my way to Walmart (how suburban of me) when I realized the song on the radio. It was one that I first heard in the days after Mom passed, "Calling all angels". The lyrics hit home then and still do. In the five years that have passed, when the song pops up on the radio, I always kind of feel like it's a little sign she's watching over me.
I still can't believe that it's been five years since she left us. I still can't believe that she's not here to see my boys and to know them in person. And yet I have faith that she does know them, I'm sure she's the force that has protected Caleb through his "danger boy" years. And I have high hopes that she is going to do the same for Cameron who is so intent on following in his big brother's footsteps, already crawling and trying to pull himself up on things.
I miss you today Mom. I wish you were here but I am grateful that you are in a better place. I'm glad that you are not trapped in a body that might have restricted you and kept you alive but miserable.
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1 comment:
Chris, I don't know if you remember this, but Sept. 16 is also the anniversary of my grandmother passing away, our freshman year of college. It was the fifteenth anniversary of her death, and she too will never know her great grandchildren.
It hurts, but that's life, isn't it. So hard and yet so beautiful all at the same time.
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